• CONTRACTOR - A gambler who never gets to shuffle, cut or deal!
• BID OPENING - A poker game in which the losing hand wins.
• LOW BIDDER - A contractor who is wondering what he/she has left out.
• ENGINEER'S ESTIMATE - The cost of construction in Heaven.
• CRITICAL PATH METHOD - A management technique for losing your shirt under perfect control.
• OSHA - A protective coating made by half-baking a mixture of fine print, split hairs, red tape and baloney - usually applied at random with a shot gun.
• STRIKE - An effort to increase egg production by strangling the chicken.
• DELAYED PAYMENT - A tourniquet applied at the pockets.
• COMPLETION DATE - The point at which liquidated damages begin.
• LIQUIDATED DAMAGES - A penalty for failing to achieve the impossible.